Meltdown

"If I could dive into the core of a reactor, then I would be forgiven And all my sins would be absolved..."
- Rin Kagamine

The night air was always a little too chilly for my comfort. 

I hadn't thought too much about how things were going on - I hadn't written about my thoughts for a long time, nor had I read anything that constituted a primary interest of what seemed to be an escapist move into an alternate dimension. It was forlorn, despairingly so, that shreds of old a being seemed to fade and disappear as time went on - just like how shreds of the rips on the jeans continued to expand, revealing pale skin that was underneath it. There was something shameful and undesirable about it, but at the same time it occurred so naturally throughout the halls of time that it would be futile and senseless to stop it. 

The world would carry on - actors and actresses would dominate the stages and there were words, words, and nothing more but words everywhere. Where there was a cliff, there was a sea - where there was a cavern, there was darkness. Humans went there and humans made mistakes and humans fell to their deaths - but where mistakes occurred and where deathly shadows appeared no one seemed to understand, nor did they realize the existence of evil clawing through what they perceived to be a normal life. 

Screaming through the night, laughing at two in the morning with nothing but a senseless drive and a streak of passion - would that be a normal life of an individual, or would that be the life of a normal individual? What society constructed was nothing more than what was perceived - in truth, everything was nothing but a relative piece of art. There were things to be defined and things to be understood - but in the mad heap of twisted metal there was nothing to be found, nothing to be comprehended. What was left was mankind's inability to trust and accept - and with that, a heavy price was paid for generations and generations of passivity. 

It was said that passivity could be more dangerous than the actual act of harming - for passivity was silent, and silence was mankind's greatest weakness. Strength, where present, had to be utilized to its fullest capabilities in order to steer themselves to the direction they wanted - conquer the greatest oceans, conquer the skies and conquer their very hearts where what they feared the most laid. 

What would be the very best course of action to take, then? In the face of pure fear, it would be almost impossible to act upon rationality or anything that would remotely resemble rationality. The world that individual knew would seem infinitely far away - and from here a new individual wold emerge, one that acted on fear and pure, unadulterated adrenaline alone. From that time onward, there would only be two decisions - to fight or to run. Fight or run. Run or fight. Run and fight - fight and run. Would choosing both be a course of idiocy, or would it be comprehensible to the logical being - only one who was placed in that exact situation would understand and react in a way to what he felt was logical. Everything was relative, after all. Under close scrutiny, there would be nothing that was right in this world - where feelings reigned and corruption thwarted justice, there was nothing that could even feel remotely right. At that precise moment there would be nothing but mind and matter in motion, where binary forms intertwined and imposed its falsity upon the people who placed their trust on something higher. 

In the end, would there even be a choice?