You are a dear, dear friend of mine. Through practical analogy, I can more-or-less theoretically dissect your feelings and figure out why you act that way.
But I am your friend. I'm not supposed to treat you as a test subject, and neither should you treat me as someone to be used either.
Perhaps we're just using each other, after all. That wouldn't be so bad, would it? Friends with benefits, maybe - like what the rest of them would say to me last time. Friends with benefits - benefits that don't seem beneficial to me at all.
But I still try to feel, to understand - and in many ways, I can, and I do - because everyone, no matter who they are, has an ugly side that they never would want anyone else to see.
You trusted me enough to show yours to me, and it took me quite some time to shove some sense back into you. It's quite understandable if you don't have the ability to face me, for now.
I could use all these against you.
I really could.
Still, I gave you my word - that as long as you continue trusting me, you can count on me to continue keeping your secrets safe.
Perhaps this is what true friends are like. Knowing each other so well until you end up showing your nastiest side to them, and trusting them to keep them safe for you without using it to their advantages - even if you know that your friend could be one of the most cunning, cold persons you've ever met.
I'm glad you trusted me, despite the possibilities. It just shows that there are people who still believe in me yet.
If we only continue using each other, then so be it. Maybe something interesting will happen in the future - who knows?
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